Dating trends are always changing. It started with mutual friends fixing dates for their friends. However, with the emergence of social media, dating apps and other mediums, it has become easier to connect with more people. Online dating has become the norm of new-age romance and catchy terms and phrases, like fizzling and masterdating, have taken the internet by storm. Gen Z is currently ruling the dating scenario and the relationship scene has taken a turn. Now, ‘boysober’, a new relationship trend is on the rise among all who are fed up with modern dating.
According to The Independent, the term ‘boysober’ was first coined by American comedian Hope Woodard. The trend is basically about keeping your twenties untainted by toxic dating habits and roundabout relationships. In her words, it’s about removing the “fake sense of validation that we get from dating and situationships and sleeping around, and refocusing that energy”. In simpler words, boysober is a yearlong decision to abstain from all-things dating as an act of self-care – including sex.
While boysober can be misconstrued to only pertain to women, in actuality, it is a gender-neutral term. It encourages all young single people to take a break from not only dating and the situationships resulting from it but also from exes, toxic relationships and hook-ups. A boysober year gives space to reflect, heal, and focus on what one wants next, Woodard explained.
According to Today, boysober is GenZ’s version of sex positivity. It is preaching the age-old wisdom of the importance of self-love in romantic relationships.
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Ms Woodard, however, explained that the concept of boysober is different from celibacy – something more often associated with religious prohibition. “I hate ‘celibacy’ so much, because I don’t want to give credence to anyone saying you’re more lovable or respectable or better if you’re not having sex,” Ms Woodard said. “Boysober is about taking time to pause, reflect and reprioritize – not to gain male (or female) approval,” she added.
Notably, boysober is not the only dating trend that made news in recent times. ‘Penny method’ has been described as one of the most toxic trends, while ‘Ground hogging’ is the number one dating trend to avoid.
‘Penny method’ is all about weaning someone off the effort that was once used to win them over at the start of a relationship, internationally and methodically, until they’re happy with the bare minimum. ‘Ground hogging’, on the other hand, is the idea of dating or seeking the same type of person over and over again while expecting different results.
